Could it be that I stand here, a million different realities lying before each moment?

And I am in control of each one if only I have the awareness to choose it?

I make meaning of a gesture, a tone, and my reality can shift just like that.

He’s mad at me, she doesn’t like me, or maybe the tone means nothing at all—a gesture, a mere twitch that the one gesturing didn’t even realize she made.

But now I’ve created a reality where she doesn’t like me, and I’m living it out.

I begin to see and prove where this is true and make up stories in my mind as real as a reality TV show, telling the truth with no behind-the-scenes explanations for the bug that tickled her face, causing a twitch that looked like a glare straight at me.

But what if I could change the script? Rewrite the scene?

I could choose to see the twitch as nothing more than a passing moment, unconnected to me.

I could live in a reality where I am free from these imagined judgments, where each gesture and tone is just a part of the unfolding story, maybe it’s not even about me.

What then, would my reality be?

_________________

Life is full of moments that shape our perceptions. These perceptions, in turn, mold our realities. Every day, we encounter countless gestures, tones, and expressions. Our minds, ever quick to interpret and assign meaning, often turn these fleeting moments into definitive statements about our worth and relationships.

Think about it. How often do we misinterpret someone’s actions or words, letting our insecurities dictate the narrative? A raised eyebrow becomes a sign of disdain. A delayed response morphs into rejection. In the vast landscape of human interactions, we often create stories that imprison us in a reality built on misinterpretations and fear.

But what if we could change that? What if we had the power to rewrite these stories, to view each gesture and tone as neutral events rather than personal judgments?

The truth is, we do have that power. By becoming aware of our tendencies to jump to conclusions, we can start to question the narratives we create. Was that frown really directed at me, or was the person simply lost in thought? Did that curt reply mean they were upset with me, or were they just having a bad day?

When we start to see these moments for what they truly are—mere fragments of an unfolding story—we free ourselves from the weight of imagined judgments. We allow ourselves to live in a reality where we are not constantly seeking validation or fearing rejection.

In this newfound freedom, we can experience life more fully and joyfully. We can engage with others without the constant fear of what they might think of us. We can appreciate each moment for what it is, not what we fear it to be.

So, the next time you find yourself caught in a web of doubt and misinterpretation, pause and ask yourself: What if this isn’t about me? What if this moment is just a passing scene in the grand story of life?

By choosing to see the world this way, we open ourselves to a multitude of positive realities. We gain control over our emotional responses and embrace a life filled with more peace, joy, and connection.

What then, would your reality be?

Embracing Shadows, Illuminating Hope,
Chelsey Fjeldheim, LCSW
Empowering Souls on the Path of Healing

Copyright © 2024 Chelsey Fjeldheim, Courage Speaks Counseling