When trauma is your normal

new_normal

“I had a good childhood,” she said.

“It was normal. I spent all my time with my horses. Oh, how I loved those horses.”

And her childhood was normal— it was normal because that is what she knew.

The sounds of her parents yelling. Normal.

Her father hitting her mother. Normal.

Never feeling safe. Normal.

When you grow up in this kind of a normal life, you adapt to your normal. And these adaptations become a part of who you think you are.

Yes, you may alter yourself, adjust, and modify your behavior, but that isn’t who you are. It’s what you do to exist, to keep moving forward, to make it through the days.

It is amazing to me that someone so small can do that. It’s brilliant, really. You did what you needed to do to survive.

And maybe now is a good time to say ‘thank you for helping me back then, but I don’t need you anymore.’

And then…discover your new normal.

Copyright © 2020 Chelsey Fjeldheim, Courage Speaks Counseling

Share This Post

Facebook

More Posts

The Hidden Impact of Subtle Childhood Wounds

The Hidden Impact of Subtle Childhood Wounds

As adults, it’s easy to dismiss certain childhood experiences as insignificant or to downplay their effects on our emotional well-being. We may look back at seemingly minor moments—like a hurried

Categories

Let's Connect!

We have lots of good stuff to share with you and promise not to fill your inbox! Sign up to get news & happenings such as events, workshops, psychoeducation on trauma, blog posts, and more!
Newsletter Form
This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.
logo

Because you matter. You are important. You are worth it.

Phone: (406) 885-6538
Email: chelseyf@couragespeakscounseling.com
Address: 65 Commons Way, Kalispell, MT 59901